hitting new lows....

i hate to admit it but it has finally happened...I actually got so bored in school I fell asleep standing up during one of my lessons....and even worse, i figured out how to sleep in the bathroom over the squatter....yeah, i know, its gross and wierd, and while i was doing it, I kept thinking that if i were doing heroin this would be the moment that I would realize i had hit rock bottom....but in this case, it was simply a matter of sheer exhaustion, and nowhere else to sleep...believe me, i scoped the entire school. And somehow, i managed to convince myself that it was okay, because at least an hour before the entire bathroom had been thoroughly cleaned by the school kids (they have a daily cleaning job, in lieu of hiring a janitorial staff)....you know what, now that i actually think about it...there are no excuses...it pretty pathetic no matter how you look at it.


New forms of torture by the Japanese school system. So i show up at the elementary school on friday, and the teachers are all like..."go outside now, its time to run!!" And i'm flashing back to the time there was an earthquake drill and i had no idea as to why the teachers were dragging me outside....so i figure, it must be something similar....well, turns out that EVERYONE had to run around the track....and all I had to wear were Doc Marten Mary Janes...so not appropriate for this moment. Anyhow, this is how it all played out...While the 80s muzak blared on the speakers, the students and teachers had to run until the muzak stopped. I kept saying silent prayers that it would all be over soon...meanwhile the 1st graders lapped me, like 3 times. Thankfully, after 4 laps the muzak stopped and I could go back to my inactive self.

Rants about water and heat

So I am sitting in my apartment right now, typing out this entry. All I can think about is the downpour of water coming from my balcony. I don't know what it is from, but there is this pipe on my outside balcony that has been spouting continually for about 2 days now. Obviously, this is not a good thing...and of course i have told somebody about it, but nobody seems too concerned (let's not even start with the wasting of water or the possible gigantic water bill which i will probably receive this month). I mean, I live on the 4th floor of an apartment building...so if something is leaking, isn't it obvious that water damage may occur to the floors below? I mean, this isn't a case of just the "dumb foreigner" will be effected by the leak...everyone in the building could potentially get effected...so shouldn't someone check on this? I mean, i guess i have to look at the whole situation this way...a) I am a foreigner, therefore in the minds of those that I deal with (sadly this is too often the case) I must not actually understand the situation, so it can not be as bad as I claim it to be. b) everything in this country takes years to deal with...(i.e. internet took 3 weeks to set up, bank account took 3 days, building a small house can take 8 months after groundbreak) so it is possible that it isn't because i am a overdramatic foreigner that they are ignoring me...it might just be that they arent in any sort of rush to deal with things. c) tomorrow is a holiday, so nobody will deal with it then.. now I have to wait until wednesday (after work, someone will come to my house to verify that yes its true there is water spewing from a pipe on her balcony...then they will call a plumber/handyman to come and deal with it, which lets face it might be weeks before they appear) What is with this place?

Next question: Why aren't the schools insulated or heated? Today was a warm day....thank goodness, because that meant I didn't have to teach class thru chattering teeth....(keep in mind it is only november..i have a long winter a head of me). My teacher informed me last week that it is considered rude to wear gloves indoors...can't help it though, because my fingers were turning purple....(and really, why should I care if i am considered rude..i mean i am constantly breaking etiquette as is...blowing my nose, albeit softly, in public....eating/drinking as i walk/ride my bike down the street....taking phone calls on the train (okay that's pretty rare, but sometimes it is a necessity). The point is, can't i just chalk up the glove thing as being an ignorant gaijin....i mean, i don't really want to lose any of my digits due to frostbite...and yes, i feel it may be an actual possibility...I mean on thursday, i could actually see my breath as i was teaching....And really, why do they insist on keeping the windows open, when it is like sub-zero outside (in celsius that is)....

So today,I went out and bought tons of those instant heatpacks that i used to put inside my boots and gloves for skiing....I was told that although i can't wear gloves, i can hold a couple of these heat things to keep warm....great, no problem...except these things remind me of maxi pads...and frankly, i can't take myself serious, when i teach while grasping one of these things so tightly you would think it was my life raft....it looks like a maxipad...it isn't subtle...rainbow gloves would be more subtle...

why why why???

"I forgot what its like to be normal....to feel normal" -Rooney

Spent the weekend in Tokyo. Caught the Shinkasen Friday after work and was at my hotel by 10.30. Giving me enough time to change clothes, and drag my father out on the town. We had a really good time. You know, father/daughter bonding. He's a great guy to travel with, because he just goes with the flow. So we went to Roppongi and did a bit of wandering...most of which was off the beaten path, since i was gathering some materials for the 'zine. I found lots of random pictures, but nothing mind-blowing. There was a white trash charms store...which made my day, as they are one of my favorite stores back home, and I had no idea that they were also in Tokyo. Then we went to TGIFridays...which has never been one of my favorite resturants...I don't even think I've been there since college...but regardless, I was so happy to be able to eat at a resturant that didn't offer udon on the menu. We left the resturant at 1am. Not because the food was fabulous and we had to gorge ourselves, but because I honestly forgot what it was like to be in an area where people would wander the streets at that hour. I mean in my little hamlet, the streets are empty at 9 pm. At 1 Am i could run for miles naked, and see nobody. Anyhow, I had no idea it was as late as it had become.


Saturday, I went to Disney Sea, the new Tokyo Disney theme park. Which was totally fun (I know, I am a geek)...they had some great rides, but much like California Adventure, it doesn't really take up the entire day. So by noon, I had gone on all of the major rides (indiana Jones, 20,000 Leagues under the sea, journey to the center of the earth) a couple of minor rides (Journey of Sinbad and the carosel), and caught a show (the little mermaid show...which was really cool, because it was all of the castmembers were attached to trapezes, so they could float freely thru the air...and there were some amazing puppets that were used to represent some of the fish and the sea witch). By 4pm I had seen every inch of the park, gone on all of the rides, and wandered into every store. So I headed back to the hotel.

That night, I caught up with my wonderful friend Y, who lives in Tokyo. We had a wonderful bbq buffet (it was so Las Vegas) at the hotel (which is owned by the US Government, so its totally and american establishment...they even have american tv channels, american shopping areas, and they accept american money...crazy!!) I don't know, if under normal circumstances I would have been as excited as i was over this buffet. But, Y and I ...we were so stoked...I mean, its been ages since I've had any sort of bbq...and they had corndogs, and cornbread, and salad...and baked potatoe soup...It was like HeAVEN....afterwards the two of us continued my search for 'zine materials, by going to Harajuku (where the goth kids hang out)....there were no goth kids to be seen, but we did find some random English signs....It was so wonderful to see Y and just wander the streets late at night and feel like i was in a real city.

Sunday, Dad and i did a bit more random touring. We went to Asakusa so I could get smoke blown on me for a blessing (I've become very superstitious)...then we went back to Harajuku where I got tons of photos of the crazy cos play kids. My favorites were the Dancing Rockabilly guys. My dad had seen them on a previous visit and was really excited to see that they were still hanging out at the same spot...they were like a bunch of asian elvises...it was fantastic. Before catching the Shinkasen back home, we stopped at a couple of art galleries....i got a new painting which i am really excited about. i love wandering thru galleries and checking out what people are doing.

This was such a great weekend. I totally felt like my old self. Not that I am miserable here but it was so nice to just feel normal. And to be surrounded by many of the things that i never really thought I would miss, but i totally do (crowds, chaos, american food, american shopping, traffic, galleries, museums, having a million choices of what to do with my day or night, enough resturant choices to fill a zagat guide, and not having to think really hard as to how I am going to communicate something...because trully 90% of Tokyo speaks English)

Western food night

I have managed to really fill up my week (schedule-wise that is). Mondays and Fridays i have 2 hours of Japanese lessons. Tuesdays are free. Wednesdays are western food night and Thursdays are movie nights. The weekends are spent roadtripping to far and away places.

Tonight, I hosted western food night at my house. Which meant that 10 of my nearest and dearest came over for pasta with homemade sauce, garlic bread, and a humungous salad. It was a bit nuts, because more and more people kept joining in, but turned out quite well in the end. The principal is that once a week a group of us foreigners get together for a western style meal. Last week we had pizza at Nick's houuse. Its a lot of fun, and you get to check out other people's situations. Plus, I really like the group of people. They are from all over the place, Canada, America, New Zealand, Mexico and England.

i just can't believe i was able to fit 10 people in my living room, all crowded around my tiny kotatsu (coffee table).

Going to Tokyo with my dad for the weekend. Can't wait to get out of here for a day or two. Hoping to see a couple of friends, and maybe hit Disney Sea...(I know, I am such a geek).

Things I never imagined I'd say...

I have noticed that as time goes by in Japan, there are all sorts of things that pop out of my mouth, that I never, ever would have thought I'd say...such as, "I'll have the instant coffee with the powdered cream." Until coming to this country, I thought instant coffee was something that became extinct with the dawning of Starbucks and Coffee Bean...I mean, am I just really lame? but do people in North America actually drink that stuff? Regardless, of how ill-informed I am about the drinking habits of the American/Canadian public, I have learned to appreciate the caffeine content of instant coffee granules. And because my schools don't actually own coffee makers, it's my only choice...I have found that it helps to make me hyper enough to face a slew of elementary kids.

"Oh my god, the monkey bit my thumb!" Never, would I have believed that i would get bitten by a monkey...a dog, yes...a cat, maybe...a rabbit, doubtful...but a monkey? What?? So I was in Shodoshima this weekend, and I was sitting on a log (in a wild monkey park) and one of the monkeys decided to make friends with me...so he climbed into my lap. And that was cool, we had a moment. I petted his head, and told him I thought he was sweet, he looked deep into my eyes...and i realized he was kind of stinky. So I tried to pick him up to put him on the ground nicely...you know, in a polite manner. That is when he firmly grasped my thumb and bit it really hard. I was like...man oh man, I'm going to have to get a rabies shot....how could this happen to me? What kind of wierd luck do I have. Well, luckily he didn't break the skin, so all I have to contend with is a couple of bruises, which are almost gone by now.

"Is this liver? In my school lunch?" yes, its true, I was served liver for school lunch...and you know what...I still can't stand the stuff...even years after my mom used to force it on me, and I'd drown it in ketchup...it still makes me gag. And I didn't even know what it was...no matter the spices that are used (in this case teriyaki sauce) it always tastes the same. And now, I am more leary about the meat in school lunch, than ever...rumor has it, at some point they will serve me tripe...and possibly tongue....I am so turning vegetarian, again.

"If only there were real toilets at my school." That's right, there are only those squatter, hole in the ground type of toilets at my school. Really, it isn't that big of a deal anymore...except for the fact that my friends were telling me that is where they go to nap in the afternoon, when there isn't anything to do but sit in the teachers room and stare into space. They lock themselves in a stall, put the lid down and nap their hearts out.....oh how i wish....

"What I wouldn't do for a slice of cheddar/goat/mozzarrella (fill in the blank with a random cheese)" I swear Japan is the capital of bad procesed cheese. Its actually rather disgusting. i didn't even know how much I liked cheese until I moved to this country. Now I find myself wandering into gourmet stores, excited about paying $6 for a small bit of cheddar.


"i have no clue, what's on this menu...just point and pray." Living in rural japan, this is sadly a common truth.

2nd dates, religious zealots, and accidental palm-readings all in a weeks work.

I'll start with the religious zealots story, as i tried to post it before, but strangely my blog chose to crash at the moment, and i lost the entire entry...I'm thinking some sort of higher being maybe monitoring this blog.

So my predecessor was a very religious man....he actually started a church in my little rural town, and recruited a couple of townies to be members. Nothing wrong with that...I was very straightforward with him, in that it was not something that I would be maintaining, or for that matter participating in. Besides, I never really thought much about it. That is, until Wednesday, the fateful day when my English teacher and i were discussing holidays. I have had to start teaching the elementary kids about x-mas. I don't really like to push religion on people, so I wasn't planning on making it a whole religious ordeal, but at the same time it is kind of the reason behind the holiday....so I was a bit torn, so i asked my English teacher for advice. She solved the problem by saying that the Japanese were really only interested in Santa and presents...so I guess other than a nod to the holy ones, I'm teaching commercialism all the way. That solved, the teacher then asked me if I had ever heard of a holiday called hanukkah (sorry I know i just misspelled that) and was it a REAL holiday. I guess I must of had a "okay, where are the hidden cameras, you can't be serious look" on my face, because she quickly explained to me that a former JET had mentioned hanukkah to her. But when she asked my predecessor about it, he told her that it wasn't a real holiday, and that it wasn't actually something that was celebrated in America. Now, I wish i could chalk that comment up as a misunderstanding or a miscommunication...but this English teacher, has amazing English speaking skills...She understands the language almost better than me...so no, I don't think that was the case....and when I mentioned it to people who knew him....they concurred and said, "yep, he was the guy who was trying to erradicate all "false" religions from the world, by sharing the word of "his" god to the Japanese people." Now I have to wonder what goes on at that church he started.....oh and by the way, I have made it a point to over inform the people of this town about the ways of Christmas, Hannukkah, Kwanzaa, Festivus, and Christmakah...because really they need to know ALL the different holidays that we Americans celebrate...even the made up ones.

Next, Accidental Palm-readings....okay so crazy woman in my town...she's well meaning, but get wierder and wierder every time I see her...well, she's clairvoyant (or so she claims) with the special ability to read people's past and future in their hands...or simply by touching the person and feeling their aura. (I know, you can sense me rolling my eyes, and you can't see me...you too must be clairvoyant)....So I'm over at her house, working on a project, and she asks to see my hands...now, I wear a lot of rings, so this is not an unusual request. So she takes a quick glance at my hands and starts spouting stuff like..."wow...hmm...err...ohhh...well, it seems you will get married and have kids (like I was worried) but it won't be till later in life." "And it looks like you have had a very long relationship with a man (in my head, i'm wondering if 7 months actually counts as being a long relationship, because I don't consider it to be that way.) at least 5-7 years"...which then I can't help but laugh at...because no, I'm positive I haven't had the relationship....then she says in an ominous tone, "well then obviously you let him go and screwed it up." At which point I was like..okay, i never asked you to read my palms, so i think you need to back off now. Unfortunatly, this latest info had the undesirable effect of my sitting up at night questioning, who she is talking about....The truth is, she is full of shit, there is nobody that falls into that category. All the boys I have ever dated who could have fallen into that category are happily married or engaged, and if I had made it work with any of them, they would never have met that girl, and I wouldn't be here right now...I think even though its a bit wierd here at times...things are the way they should be in the universe...and I am positive she is a quack....but its totally annoying to have this unsolicited reading...because i can't help but have it play in the back of my mind.

Lastly, 2nd dates....I know you have been waiting with baited breath to hear whether or not I would ever go on a 2nd date with the japanese blind date guy....worry no more, i've had the date and boy was it as sucky as the 1st one....You may or may not recall, the crazy woman set me up on a blind date with one of her students...He doesn't speak english, I don't speak Japanese...we have no common interests, and I don't find him attractive...so basically we have nothing. That said, why on earth would i accept a 2nd date? Well that too is a good question...Crazy woman, told her student that I liked him (even though I made it clear that although I was sure he was a nice human being, i had no interest in him) and made a huge point of him contacting me and going to a movie with me. Then told me, "Oh I'm sorry, I thought you might be getting lonely, so you really should go out with him. But if you decide not to, be kind and don't hurt his feelings"....so here I am with a HUGE language barrier...its hard enough to get out of a date if you speak the language, there was no way I could be graceful about this. So...I agreed to the date...with the understanding that it would be a movie and that would be it.

The date...Let me just say, that I was nice, I was kind, I was fun...I can be a really great date...but all wit was completely lost on him...and if he was funny and charming, I so didn't get it. Beyond that, he told me pretty early on that he had diarrhea and had for the past 5 days....he brought to the movie giant bags of chips and began eating them straight out of the bag (by this, i mean he poured the chips straight into his mouth)....and finally he not only fell asleep during the film, he also checked his cell phone like 20 times.....Needless to say, if there HAD NOT been a communication barrier or a pushy middle man...its pretty obvious, neither of us would have gone out a second time. And at least I was polite...because I thought of being really bitchy and sabotaging things, but in the end decided I could handle it like an adult and just say i wasn't interested before moseying to my car. Too bad, i never go to use the speech...our parting was more in the way of....."yep, c-ya."

idle dinner party chatter, gnomes, and grocery shopping for eggs

Sometimes i look around and marvel at what a strange world i have stepped into. Its a bit like Alice and the Looking Glass....Take for instance the dinner I was at a few days ago. So I'm peacefully munching (er slurping...Japanese way...) some nabe (soup) at a friends place, enjoying the idle chatter that comes with hanging out with other Westerners, people whom you can talk to without having to think about explaining every word that is said in extremely elementary detail. Anyhow, the woman I am chatting with suddenly says..."oh that reminds me, I was wondering if you wouldn't mind popping by and taking some photos of me." I was like, "okay, sure". And she's like, "Well we would need to work on the lighting, I want good lighting." And I'm like..."okay, i haven't done serious photography in ages, but we can play around with it. Or I can get one of my friends who's amazing at photography to do it, cuz I know he would." And she's like, "hmmm no, I don't really like his vibe." So I said, "okay. By the way, what are these pictures for?" And she said, "Well, I'm thinking of holding a chainsaw (she's now doing some remodeling with her home) and wearing a tool belt....that would be it." Okay, so this is where I pause and almost choke on my nabe....and say, "so you'd be naked?" and she says, "well there would be the chainsaw and the tool belt, but basically, yes. Do you have a problem with that?" Which I took to be kind of a challenge, like "are you open-minded and hip enough to be able to do something like this?" Mentally, i was like...Okay, what is this woman talking about?? What? I'm lost...did I space out during the idle chatter...I mean, where was this coming from? And she's married...why can't her husband take the photos...I mean, I haven't done much photography in the last few years...and she hasn't seen ANY of my work...so WHAT?? And really, how is it that all the wierd eccentric people always manage to find me...even in Japan?

Other random thoughts...Would a japanese person recognize a gnome? And are dwarves (as in The Seven) actually gnomes? I ask, because it seems that in this fabulous country, people are obsessed with Dwarves (Dwarfs?) in their garden...I've never seen what I would consider to be an actual gnome in anybody's garden. Its a bit bizarre...but Dopey, Sleepy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Bashful, Happy, and Doc are everywhere. Including a giant postbox version (that is bigger than me...and therefore definatly not a dwarf...but maybe technically a giant gnome?) in my town. I have to remember to take a picture of it, its pretty funny and random. This place continues to amaze me with its wierdness.

Lastly, I was shopping for eggs today....I haven't actually had a reason to shop for eggs since being here, so this was the first time. And I noticed that while I had to check the eggs to make sure none of them were cracked, I also had to be on the lookout for chicken poo...yep...these eggs are fresh from the farm. Oi vey, who would have thought? Isn't there an FDA in Japan, doesn't anyone regulate these things???

Oh and one more thing, I've noticed that my minions (the young impressionable japanese kids that I teach) have picked up quite a few Lani-ism....I keep hearing kids in the hall say stuff like "Oh my god!!" or "Bummer dude" or my most favorite, because it really is random, and I didn't realize I say it so much, "Oi yai yai!!!"

domestic diva...i so am not

THis was a great weekend, I go almost everything accomplished that I set out to do..well, except my Japanese lessons....i never quite got around to studying, but hopefully I'll have the chance to squeeze an hour in before class tomorrow. Anyhow, as I was saying....I had all of these random domestic goals to accomplish...like baking rice krispie bars for a bake sale, or cooking crock pot taco casserole, or doing laundry and cleaning. For those of you reading this, who worry that maybe i've become a bit too domestic (as I was recently accused of by one of my friends....i mean, it is pretty boring in rural japan, what with no parties or bars or movie theatres, or good resturants, or shopping, or culture...but i digress) Fear not...I managed to accomplish all of my goals, however I also managed to pretty much screw them all up...and really, Who screws up Rice Krispie bars?? I mean that's like the easiest thing in the world to cook...or so I thought. Of course I still can't really figure out my oven...but that's a pretty shoddy excuse. And the crockpot stuff...i don't really know if its normal...but the whole thing was like mush...it was like food for a geriatric person...i had no idea that was what cooking in a crockpot meant. I think i am going back to buying bentos from the grocery store everyday.

Of course, I did also manage to knit a scarf, decorate my apartment for christmas, create some new pieces of jewelry, and do three art projects for my english classes...so the weekend wasn't a total bust.

My version of Tuesdays with Morrie…

Okay I haven’t read the book by Mitch Albom, but I know the basic premise. A young guy spends his Tuesdays with an old professor or mentor and learns priceless life lessons and such…In my version the guy’s name is Jack. He’s 72 and he gives me Japanese lessons 2xs a week, on Mondays and Fridays. It is possible that he is one of my favorite things about my life here. All in all I get about 1 hour and 15 minutes of Japanese lessons, the rest of the time is spent talking about the world. The community that we live in, the good, the bad, the ugly and what we can do to make it a better place. Sometimes we talk philosophy, sometimes politics. Usually we just talk about what we think about the world. Or he explains to me, some cultural issue that I don’t understand. He is the first Japanese person that I have met in this town, that is open to bigger, more creative ideas about the world. Of course, he is an outsider just like me. He was born in North Korea, to Japanese parents. Spent much of his life working in the textile industry in Taiwan and China. Lived in NY for 3 years. Spent most of his Japanese life in Osaka, and somehow ended up retiring to my little corner of the world, 8 years ago.

I live in a town of 7,000…everyone knows everything about everybody. I go to the store with one of my guy friends, the next day my students all ask if I have a new boyfriend (their mom’s and older sister’s work at the store). In a community that small, I have managed to make only superficial acquaintances. But not to worry..Jack has lived here for 8 years…and other than his wife, he has no ties to this community. Just like me, people pretend they don’t see him when he walks down the street. In his case, I don’t really understand why it is….(he believes that the community isn’t open to outsiders, which is defiantly true.)

In my case there are a number of reasons…One of which has recently been made abundantly clear. I am Okinawin. Meaning, my father’s family is from Okinawa. I am proud of my background and my family history. Just like I am proud of the fact that I am part French and Welsh. When I came to Japan, the superintendent of schools made it very clear to me, that if anyone asked I was to say that I was Japanese, NOT Okinawin….I thought that was the most ridiculous thing I had ever heard. Since I was young, I have been taught to be proud of my heritage and that I am Okinawin, not Japanese….Everything this man said to me, went against Everything my family had raised me to believe. Therefore, I never lied, nor fudged the truth, when people asked.

I am now referred to (behind my back that is) as The Okinawin. Not the American (which is what I am), nor the Foreigner (which also fits), but as The Okinawin….which I have learned in the minds of this pea-brained small town people is another word for 2nd class citizen….Welcome to racism Japanese style.

What I have learned is that much of the wrongful ways I have been treated stems from 2 things (I was born with 2 strikes against me) 1) I am an American 2) I am Okinawin with a very obvious Okinawin name. It took a moment or two after realization to come to terms with it. But I figure that I won’t be living in this town forever (9 more months to be exact) I will, however have to look myself in the mirror for a very long time. And if I were to pretend to be anything other than who I am, just to make superficial friends in this community, Well…I’m not sure I am prepared to deal with that person.

Besides, life here isn’t all bad….I mean twice a week I get to hang out with the coolest guy in town and just chill. And to me, that’s worth more than a dozen superficial friends.

Is this normal? Because in my world it's called sexual harrassment...

At school we are making a newspaper for my predecessor. You know, fill him in on all the fabulous small town things that he is missing out on. Mainly, its all school stuff, like the sports fest or the choir competition. I know he doesn't really care, but it is a sweet idea, and i am sure he will appreciate getting mail from his old "home". Anyhow, one of the things that was assigned for the newspaper was a comic strip. There are seven 8th grade boys who "volunteered" for the task. Personally, I thought the teacher was a fool for letting them do it...I mean, I made kids do individual comic strips the week before, and it was this group of boys that did a whole violent bit about killing and ended with "FUCK YOU"....soooo...(teeth sucking moment....I'm turning japanese, they do that alot) Why on earth would my teacher assign the the comic strip? I mean, its obvious they are rebelling in the most immature fashion possible.

Anyhow, so I am helping the kids with their articles. Wander the class, pretending I am being helpful and caring (actually just trying to look busy, cuz the kids clam up whenever I get near them.) And I hear they group of comicstrip boys saying my name and laughing...of course, I can only guess what horrible version of myself they have managed to sketch. I figured it had to be either horns or big anime breasts....so I wander over to there group, and the boys quickly hide the paper and continue to giggle. I tell them to get to work. Then mention to the teacher that they are drawing nasty pictures of me. The teacher was like, how do you know? And I'm like, because I can hear them saying my name, and I understand enough Japanese to know that's what they are doing. She was like whatever, and ignores it. I probably should have done the same...but since the boys were becoming more and more disruptive and I had gotten curious as to how bad the picture was, I decided to take the paper away and have a look.....OH MY LORD...nothing could have prepared me for this...I mean, it was worse than bad...it was literally nauseating. The boys, drew a picture of my naked self...focusing mainly on my crotch...then drew graphic pictures of their loins (it's hard to say all of this in a pc manner) each taking turns drawing pictures of themselves with me....Yep, I got gang-banged on paper...as you can imagine I was FURIOUS....not mortified...Angry...Pissed off as all hell...and ready to spit nails at each one of them. But alas, its not my job to punish them...so I handed the paper over to the teacher and said, this disgusts me, you need to say something to them. The teacher completely ignored the entire situation (yes, I saw her look at the picture...and yes, I saw her wad it up and throw it out) That was how the situation was handled.

At first I thought, okay, she's embarrassed, that's why she isn't saying anything right now...but no...that was not the case, she ignored it.

I walked away thinking, obviously this is a cultural issue...but what is going on?? So I called my friend up and asked her to speak to her japanese boyfriend about it. He explained that yes it is cultural. Kids are exposed to massive amounts of Manga (comic book) porn from an early age. And that this kind of behaviour was common for boys that age...No one ever tells them that it is wrong. He said, the only reason he, himself knew it was wrong, was because he had 2 older sisters who wouldn't stand for that kind of behaviour.

In America, if a kid did that in middle school, they would be suspended and their parents would be called in for a conference. If a person did something like that on the job, they would be fired and would face the possibility of a lawsuit.

I understand that this is all cultural...and to them it is no big deal...but to me, being raised in a world where this is serious social faux pas, I am really having trouble wrapping my head around it. And I am really having trouble not being angry at these delinquents for thinking so little of me that I am a mere object that they can literally fuck. And i am furious with the teacher for the way it was all ignored (but again that too is cultural).....I know I can't change this whole society's views...but the way they treat women here has always bothered me...and now its personal.

Halloween

First off, just a reminder (one of millions I'm sure) Get out and Vote. I sent in my ballot about two months ago, here's hoping that it actually gets counted.

Halloween in Japan: Technically Halloween isn't actually celebrated in japan...but like many other western holidays, (x-mas, valentine's day) it has managed to make its way over here. About a month ago I started seeing Halloween merchandise pop up in the department stores. Nothing quite like it is in America, but there is definatly a market for the products. This year, I celebrated mostly at the elementary school. I did get 2 pumpkins from my parents for carving purposes. (American pumpkins are virtually impossibble to find in Japan...you can order them thru the foreign buyers club, but after shippin and membership fees, they end up costing about $35 a pop...YIKES!) Anyhow the pumpkins that were carved were probably 2 of the most beloved pumpkins ever...I gave one to the pumpkins to the elementary school the other to the middle school. Each class was given a special presentation amongst "oohs and aaahhhs". I was amazed that most kids/teachers had never actually seen an american pumpkin/jack o lantern in real life. I guess I never actually thought of the fact that pumpkins might be native to America.

At the Elementary school, I was in charge of the halloween party for the kids. I was under the impression that it would be one giant party for ALL of the kids...instead it ended up being about 10 individual parties for each class...and the kids that didn't have class with me on friday, had a party today. Just to reiterate the Japanese people really know how to beat a dead horse. I mean, come on...how many times can I do Trick or Treat...or pin the tail on the donkey...or charades....after about 3 parties, i had lost interest in the entire thing but still had to "perform" for 7 more parties. Funny thing about elementary kids' costumes...they are almost always made out of black garbage bags...it was like looking out to a pond of bag people.